long long love story. from a distance.

I am a simple human being. I am a mother of One precious little girl. I am a wife of a Seafarer.

Long Distance Relationship. According to Wikipedia, LDR is typically an intimate relationship that takes place when the partners are separated by a considerable distance. Almost 1 in 10 marriages reported to have been engaged in a long distance relationship.

I came from a not so welled off family. I heard that when you become or when you marry a seaman, you will become rich. so when I was on my grade school, I had this mindset in marrying a "seaman" (as what we all usually call it). Funny, but that's what I though about them. (haha!)

On my high school days. I have this dream of meeting my biological father. My mother told me he was a seafarer. And so that gave me an inspiration to really marry a seaman. I am hoping, my future husband will help me look for him.

During my college days. I was able to know about PMMA. It was a Maritime School located in San Narciso, Zambales. I went to their forum, the PMMAYER.net. I met a lot of Seniors and Juniors also the wives and the gf's. (Sorry, i have to skip on how i was connected to PMMA before.. haha!). There is this one person from batch 80's, he is now a Captain, he volunteered to help me look for my father in any ways he can. And oh! We have the same birthday.. :)

I first visited Zambales, July 2, 2009. But I first entered the Academy on August 2009. It was the first Aquintance party I attended.(My husbie prepared for the event, he was the steering committee chairman). I also attended February 2010's Valentines Party. I used to hear about my husbie's name on my "tropa".

He was the best painter.

He was the best in academics.

He was the one who made the design of their batch seal.

He was the best in drawing.. etc..

I was really curious about this guy names John Geoex Valenciano. Until graduation came. A friend of mine introduced him to me when it was his turn to go up the stage. I was about to take a picture of him, but he looks at me as if he was saying "cge subukan mo". And so I put down the camera. Hahaha.

I was able to interact with him during the popularity of Friendster. And was really amazed on how he described himself. I didn't make any move to get to know him not until Facebook came. :)

I looked for his account, and luckily, even though he kept his real identity. I was able to identify his account. I added him. Made a comment on all of his posts. (I was just making papansin. haha). I really want to know him since I was curious on how weird his posts and comments.

And Pooofff!!!

He chatted. We exchanged numbers. (Until now he kept on claiming I asked for his number first though he was the one who made it. haha) We met last June 29, 2010. We went to a movie. We kissed. (Aamin ako.) Since he thought I was one of those girls who will easily fall unto his "pambobola", well, I proved him wrong! I went straight home.

We still used to text. He is not fond of calling anyway. Not until the month of August 2010. He really never texted and worst he is not answering my call. But I never had a single doubt. I will fight for this. He again texted the next month. And I really assumed "Kami na!" (hehe. kakahiya, assumera ako. haha).

It was his Board Exam day. The day after, he declared that it will be our official day. November 17, 2010. Stunned. Haha! Akala ko lang pala kami na noon pa.. hahahaha!

As days goes by, the relationship went well and good. It was March 26, 2011 that I learned I was pregnant with our baby. It was 4 in the morning. I called him up and told him, "you're now a father". He just said "Congrats!".. ( Haha. Parang napilitan lang)

As days goes by, I asked myself. Do I still want to stick on my mindset to marry a seafarer for some wrong reason I made way back grade school? Hindi ko na siya makapa sa puso ko. I will marry because I now love the him. And I want to grow old with him.

Our life goes on. When I was on my 6th month of pregnancy, it was his turn to go onboard. I was thinking it wouldn't be that hard since I will be very busy with my work and my baby. But it's not that easy having a long distance love. We have this fvcking different time difference in different countries. I used to wake up even if it is 2 in the morning just to have a memorable chat with him. Yeah! everyday chat is a memorable one.

Communication was cut for a maximum of 3 lloooonnnggg weeks. It was really hard since I can't tell him what I want, what am i feeling. I am pregrant and it is so hard for me since I am living on my own. I need him but he can't be with me since he needs to go to work for our future.

I gave birth, since he was not there. My labor pain took 14 hours. I really wished he was there through my hard times. I saw my baby, he does not.

He went home. He saw and carry our baby. And we got married. August 22, 2012.

Currently he is on board for a month. I still have to wait for another 6-7 months. Same longing. Same emptiness. That is just the odd feeling of marrying a mariner. A lot of patience, sacrifice is needed to work things out. We had a fight. We reconcile. We are now on our 1 year and 11 months of being together. One more month and we will be on our second year! And I am hoping for a more years to come.

Kudos to those ladies who until now survived long distance relationship. I learned to have more and more patience.

"No great love ever came without great struggle."

HUSBIE YOU ARE THERE AND I AM HERE. I LOVE YOU. WE LOVE YOU AND WE MISSED YOU!

Happiness is not an option. It’s a choice.

As for what happiness means, it is a mental or emotional state of well-being characterized by positive or pleasant emotions ranging from contentment to intense joy.

A child.

When I was a child, my step dad used to give us Php1.00 every time he comes home after work. I bought candies, junk foods, and the like. I thought that was just what happiness means. I get and I ate what I want.

A teenager.

As I entered the teenage life, it changes. If I’ll be able to go to college, then I’ll be the happiest ordinary teenage girl dreaming to finish college. Since we have a problem financially, I still dreamt of going to one of the college schools. I took up UPCAT. And luckily, I was able to pass the exam. But maybe, for some instances, there are a lot of hindrances. So I wasn’t able to pursue going to UP Iloilo. Instead I went to UC-Main. But still, my college life didn’t worked out. I had a friend who let me join her to work in an internet café. So I work there as an attendant. With Php150.00/day. For me it means a lot of happiness.

I fell in love.

I fell in love for the first time. Happy. But I don’t have the word contentment. So I had my first heartbreak. I thought happiness would leave me alone.

Entered Corporate World.

But when I entered the Corporate World of business. Everything changes. At first I only earned Php180/day as an Encoder Staff (Since I haven’t finished college). I thought, wow! This is amazing. I am now earning. A lot. Another meaning of happiness for me. I was promoted as Accounting Staff and later on as a Finance Supervisor.

Fell In love for the second time.

But I fell in love for the second time. It was the worst day. The worst thing. I gave up my work (My work is one of my happiness). I went to Manila to fix everything. Since we had a long distance affair. But still it didn’t worked.

Moving On.

Since then, I continue my life. I moved on. Good thing I was able to find a job in Makati. But I don’t have any contentment yet. Something’s missing.

New Man.

Until one day. This one man I met. He was the typical “Bolero”. And for once. I fall in love. I thought everything will be perfect. Everything will fall into the right places. And So I just thought.

I got pregnant.

And for the past 22 years of my life, I had finally felt the real meaning of happiness and contentment. I had brought to life a real angel. My little Maria Krishna Gianna. She changed my life. Not to mention the harsh thing that was done to me. But since the father of my baby told me it was all over. I tried to forget what had happened.

I got married.

Atlast. I got married to the father of my baby. We had it secretly done. We doesn't want to have any appointment's again.

Pains.

We had a lot of issues which wasn’t solved yet. It was really painful. We tried to talk but it got worst.

Happiness. Pleasant. Contentment.

I asked myself. What are the things that could give me happiness and contentment? And this was all that entered through my mind:

1.  To live with my little angel alone with me.
2. To walk through life with my baby.
3. To have a peaceful mind with my baby.
4. To go somewhere on where I could forget the pain.
5. To be with someone who could understand what I’m going through.
6.  To talk to someone who could enlighten my mind.

The Big Boss.

And I realize. All I need is God. The big boss up there. I need Him more than anyone else. I prayed harder. Until no more tears would love to fall down.

Selflessness.

I was just thinking of my own happiness. What about my little angel’s happiness? What if one day she asks for an explanation on what had happened? Am I strong enough to explain to her that all I want is just the real happiness and a peaceful mind away from those people who caused me pain? Since I love my baby that much. I decided to hold on still to our family.

Own Family.

This is not what I thought of raising a family. But still, I am trying to bring happiness to my own family.  As long as I have my man and my angel, I may face the future with confidence and full of hopes.

Future Plans.

•  To have our own so called “HOME”
•  Have our own car.
•  Get a passport with my baby and go wherever we want.
• Have to pay in full my baby’s educational plan.
•  Have to pay in full my st. peter plan. J
• Finish college.
• Put up our own business.
• Marry again in 3 years’ time.
• Send my baby to school.
• Answer my baby’s questions out of curiousity.
• Learn how to cook.
• Play different sports with my hubby & baby.
• Support my baby in whatever career she may take.
• Have my baby’s gown the same as my wedding gown.
• Go to Paris. (My hubby’s Promise).
• Go to Greece. (I was really curious about the place)
• More prayers. Hard Prayers.
• To adopt one child every Christmas and new year.
• To treasure and cherish every moments with my hubby and my baby.
• To love my own family unconditionally.
• To surrender everything to the big boss. GOD. 

I now know that I am choosing happiness as a choice not an option. Be happy everyone. J

my 7 months and 2 weeks old baby sits and stands alone..:)

so overwhelming hearing my baby says "mamamama" and she's headin at you. which means she recognizes me as her mom. and now it's mommy's first time to see her baby sits alone (though her lola and nanny told me she already can when she was still in her 6 months. she can also stand in herself with my guidance.. (gabay-gabay muna).. 


parang kelan lang.. my baby once cannot even carry her own head. and look at her now. she's beginning to do things independently. 


everyday I always say this " thank you Lord for giving me the biggest blessing on the moment of my existence "..

i love you so much baby.. mommy will always be here for you through all your "firsts" and forever..




my life and my everything.. :)

more than winning in a contest..:)

Since my baby is a Nivea user since she was born. I looked for it's facebook account and like their page so i'll be able to check updates from them. In fairness to them, they have the best product that my baby uses so far.


Got this one day, my baby was sleeping. I was just browsing my facebook then suddenly I was able to open Nivea Baby Philippines ( https://www.facebook.com/NIVEABabyPhilippines ).. i saw this one application which is the Caring for you Journal. Knowing my hobbies, i used to design scrap books. Anything that needs enhancements. i'm on the go!




I was amazed with this baby journal. I joined and updated my baby's journal. Then suddenly, one of the group in facebook where I was a member. She tagged me into a post stating that me and my baby won a Nivea Gift Pack. My baby was chosen as Nivea Baby for the week. I was at once shocked coz I really wasn't aware that It was a contest. 


I was really proud of my baby. And thank Nivea Baby for giving my baby a chance to participate in their weekly award.. :)

here is her picture..

so this is more than winning a contest. even though she was not chosen. She is still the most charming baby for me. And i'll be forever be proud of her. i love you anak! :)




so for all those mommies who are fund of making scrapbooks or anything that may value all your child's "firsts". go grab some guts and create your baby a nivea journal scrapbook.

Batangas Getaway!!

summer is here.. so plans of having an outing to the beach or anywhere are on it's way! yeay!!!

we just had a trip to Calatagan, Batangas last April 07, 2012.. Woke up as early as 4:00 AM to prepare for the trip. Kuya Elmer (Driver) picked us up at exactly 4:30 AM.. And here we come BATANGAS!!!

at 9:30 AM, we arrived at HI-LO Hotel & Beach Resort at Calatagan, Batangas. Feeling a little bit dizzy, me and my baby decided to took a nap..  Seeing the heat of the sun, I was like scared to go swimming. So I decided to swim at night time. 

When my baby woke up. I had her practice how to walk..

During sunset. We had a long walk to this one abandoned island for i think almost an hour.

 We had picked-up this five colored star fishes.. :)

My Mama (mother-in-law) posed to this Toyota corolla car as if she owned it.. (haha!)

Owner of a brand new Toyoto Corolla Car!

Baby had a picture with her DaddyLo (Father-in-Law).. Actually, there are a lot of them, but i just chose the best one.. :)

Pose with DaddyLo..

and ofcourse. after a long and tiring day. everybody went to sleep. All the people that slept the same room with us was amazed.. How come they didn't hear my baby cry. Well, Mother's touch is just wonderful and amazing.. :)

GOOD MORNING!! On the 8th of April, 2012.

A stolen shoot picture of MommyLa and DaddyLo with our precious beautiful baby girl..

A walk on the beach early morning is such a wonderful experience.

with Nanay, Papa, Lola Oning, Mama and our Baby Krishna. A short walk on the beach.

tabachoy mommy in the beach..haha!

baby's first time to ride on a "balsa"

Now, here is a short photo session at the yacht. meet the cast:

ate tata, new fhm model for May 2012 issue..

ate cors & kuya eric, honeymooners..

mama is, a solo lady captain

mam ella, a shy type lady

the gang..:)

farewell

last pose with mommy & baby

TILL WE MET AGAIN BATANGAS!!!!

ang aking munting anghel..:)

ang kwento ng aking munting anghel

Nung gabi ng Nobyembre 12, 2011, schedule ng aking OB check-up. Pero ang sabi ng aking Doktor, malapit na akong maubusan ng panubigan. Pero sa huling minuto, bumaliktad ang anak ko.. Pinaglakad lakad ako ng Doctor hoping na bumalik ang ulo nya sa puerta ko. Ang kaso sadyang matigas ang ulo nitong anak ko at hind na siya bumalik pa.. lalo siyang gumalaw pataas. Inischedule na ako para ma Ceasarian kinabukasan ng umaga. Walang karapatan ang sinuman na dahil CS ako ay hindi ko na naramdaman ang sinasabi nilang "Labor Pain". Naku! Buong magdamag kong pinaghirapan ang sakit na yun. Kung pwede lang tumigil ang mundo para lang mawala na din yung sakit na nararamdaman ko. Pero I just think of the brighter side. Alam ko after nito, pag nakita ko na ang dahilan kung bakit ako nahihirapan nun, magiging worth it lahat ng sakit.

Kinabukasan. November 13, 2011. Parang ang tagal ng oras. Masaya ako kasi nakausap ko pa ang aking mahal na mapapangasawa na nagbigay sakin ng lakas ng loob. Kaya ko to! Sabi ko lagi sa sarili ko. Tsaka excited na akong makita ang aking munting supling. Dinala na ako sa Operating room. Ang sakit parin. Sobrang sakit. Gusto ko nang mang-away kasi hindi pa nila sinisimulan ang operasyon. Pero pagdating ng OB ko. Agad naman na sinimulan. This is it! May narinig na akong umiiyak. I knew it! Yun na ang aking munting princesa.. Ang aming buhay. Tsaka pa lang ako nakatulog. Kampante na kasi akong safe na ang baby ko. Nagising ako sa recovery room na nanginginig. Pero nilakasan ko parin ang loob ko para magtanong kung nasaan na ang aking anghel. At kung ilang pounds siya. Atat pa nga akong pumunta na sa kwarto ko para makita na ang aking anak.

Nung ako ay dalhin na sa aming sariling silid. Wala parin ang aking anak. Ang laking disappointment ko. Ang sabi nila, marami pa daw test ang gagawin bago ibigay sa akin. Pero dumating ang gabi ay wala parin ang anak ko. Kinabukasan ay wala parin. Umiyak na ako. Kahit alam kong bawal pa akong tumayo at maglakad. Kinaya ko. Walang nagawa ang mama ko kundi sumunod at magdala ng dextrose ko papunta ng Nursery Room. Pero nung nasa bukana na kami ng Nursery Room, bigla naman akong nahilo at di nakapagsalita. Umupo ako sa may malapit na upuan. Bumalik akong bigo sa aking  kwarto. Tumawag ako sa doctor ko para magpasaklolo. Gustong gusto ko na masilayan ang anak ko. Pero ayaw parin nilang ibigay sakin. Nakipag coordinate ang aking doctor para lang mailabas at maibigay sakin ang aking baby.  

Kinahapunan sa wakas. Nasilayan ko na din ang bunga ng aking paghihirap. Walang kapantay ang kasiyahang naramdaman ko nun. Para akong nanalo sa lotto na infinite ang premyo. Ang saya! Sobrang saya! lalo na nung unang gabing natulog ako na siya ang katabi. Walang pagsidlan ang aking tuwa!

Salamat kay Bro at naging maayos din lahat. Looking forward na makita at masubaybayang lumaki ang aming munting angel.. :)